🌸 La Tela di Carlotta
Log in
it en es

A personal note on social media

Apr 26, 2017 • Living sustainably

In the past few years, La Tela has grown so much. It’s become my main job, and I love it. But what started as my little cobweb of random thoughts is now something much bigger, with readers that have expectations, companies that sponsor posts, my online courses… and sometimes I forget what it was like to just write for myself. To know where a thought starts, but not where it’ll end. Not to have timetables or deadlines. Not to care about making sense. Like a diary. These personal notes will be just that.


Lately I’ve been struggling, I haven’t been myself, I haven’t been my better self, this new life of mama of two is hard, whoever says the opposite is lying to you. When I told my struggles to a friend the other day, she said “That isn’t the impression you get on your Facebook”.

No, it’s not. I know it. Despite the fact that I do try to be honest on my blog about my struggles, social media don’t show everything, let alone everything when it actually happens. But I don’t blame my friend, because I know this is easy to forget. I forget it myself sometimes when I look at Instagram or Facebook. Is everyone always able to give their kids great, memorable adventures? Is everyone always on vacation in Thailand? Do other parents never struggle?

No. Everyone has their struggles. Behind the scenes, there are mothers in tears, breakups, career failures, financial struggles, anxiety, depression, worrying, illness, death. People just don’t show it. Because maybe people don’t want to remember a sad moment or a struggle, or maybe because it’s comforting sometimes to go back and watch your perfect life on Instagram, even if it’s only a virtual one.

And if you’re aware of it, I don’t think it’s a bad thing.

Truth is, even if my photos and blog posts show only a small part of the story, it’s all true. They’re real. The happiness of those moments is real. It’s just not whole. If you want the whole me, give me a phone call, ask me how I feel over a cup of coffee, send me a message saying you were thinking of me, write me an email and tell me about yourself. Make time for me.

Real people don’t happen on social media. Real people happen in coffee shops, at the kids playground, at your son’s kindergarten, queuing at the supermarket, unloading the car after a long day. And I’m as guilty as the next person for forgetting it sometimes, for not being able to carry forward relationships I care about, for being trapped in a spiral of family life and personal selfishness.

But if I don’t know my friends’ struggles—and their whole self—I wouldn’t blame it on Facebook. I’d blame it solely on myself.

Comments

Tell me what you think

Did you like it? Do you agree or disagree? I'd love to hear from you.

I think you'll like these

Collections

New to La Tela?

I’ve prepared collections on various topics that I’ve written over the years. Perhaps you’ll find one that interests you.

The blog

Latest from the blog

I write mostly about gentle parenting, Montessori, multilingualism, sustainability and traveling with kids (we do it full-time).

Mums, dads & kids

We don't know how to be parents, we learn it everyday as we go. This is my way of motherhood, the small victories and the bitter defeats, my inconvenient truths and the endless life lessons. And also all the baby products and toys we love the most.

Montessori

One day a few years ago my husband came home and said, "Why don't we put a mattress on the floor in the baby room? It'd be much more natural". "Never" was my reply. That's how our Montessori journey started. Since then we've been living, breathing and applying the philosophy at home day in and day out, starting from ourselves. Because educating children starts from the parents.

Living sustainably

Living sustainably for me doesn’t only mean to have a more eco-friendly lifestyle. It means to make decisions that are sustainable for our planet, the people on it, but also for our life, our lifestyle, and our happiness. It means to take any daily chance to evolve and be happier, healthier, kinder, more responsible and more caring human beings—the only sustainable way for a meaningful future.