Some emotions can’t be written down in a blog post. Some words get straight to the soul of who’s ready to listen to them. This song did exactly that and made me emotional. Because if Alex were a songwriter, he would have written many of these words for Oliver. But not just that.
It made emotional because my son’s father is the best person I know and loves us more than anything in the world. Because he talks to Oliver like he can understand him and tells him about life. Because he makes us laugh when we’re sad. Because I fall in love with him all over again every time he makes Oliver laughs his head off or plays with him in the sweetest ways. Because he never has “one of those days”. Because not one day goes by that he doesn’t tell me how beautiful I am—even when my belly is fluffy and my butt low—or Oliver how much he loves him. Because he’s always there for us. Because when we argue he forces me to hold hands and tells me “everything will be alright, we’re still friends”. Because when he sees a piece of paper on the ground, he picks it up and throws it in the bin. Because he’s honest and selfless and gives everybody the benefit of the doubt—even when they don’t deserve it. Because he’ll teach Oliver to be like him. Because he knows that sometimes you have to think about death to prepare for life—and he’s not embarrassed to cry with me when we do. Because he teaches me how to be more and more a person that I love and respect. Because he’s reserved, but accepts that I’m social and outgoing. Because he can’t wait to spend a few hours alone with Oliver and “if he cries, I’ll hold him tight and confort him. Don’t worry, we’ll be OK”. Because he can swallow his pride and change for us. Because sometimes I think I’ll never be able to give him as much as he gives us—but he doesn’t care. Because in this unpredictable and crazy life, he can still make me believe that we’ll find a way to grow grey and old together.
This is for you, my love.