Today is one of those days.
One of those days when I wake up and I wonder if it’s worth it. When I send that thought away, I put my head down, work productively, yet I keep wondering Am I good enough? When I send that thought away, I finish a task on my to-do list, I’m proud of it, yet my mind is asking Will you ever make it?
One of those days when I have to write it all down as it comes.
Are all the hours of hard work, the ongoing learning, the courses, the books, the webinars going to make a difference?
Will my blog ever be incredibly successful? When will it become a reliable source of income? How can it inspire more and more people?
I know my worth. I’m good, I commit, I work hard, I’m consistent, I know how to overcome my own resistance, fight my own devils, I know how to push through and make things happen, I’m proud of what I’ve achieved so far. Blogging is bloody hard, making money through blogging is even harder, many don’t even get to make their first cents, and I somehow managed to make… well, a lot more than that.
But when am I going to the next level? How do I get to the next level? Where is the bonus door—where you enter, eat some mushrooms, and get out through a tube into the next level? I should have played more Mario Bros.
I know my worth, I’m good. But am I good enough? And if I am good enough, why not not me? Why haven’t I found the bonus door yet? Does it exist?
All these questions will most likely be answered in some future post, on a good day, on one of those when I feel I can and will conquer the world. Tomorrow is a new day, I’ll pick a new coffee shop to work from and I’ll end my week on a positive note.
For now, goodnight.